Jessica Latshaw

musician. writer. dancer.

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St. Pat’s day in Boston.

Posted By on March 17, 2013 in Uncategorized | 8 comments

Oh my gosh, guys, St. Patrick’s Day, Boston-style is quite an experience. I’m sure I’ve seen that many people in one spot before–downtown Tokyo is like, really really crowded!–but never that many people all wearing green.

And never that many people so very drunk, either.

Let me just preface it by saying that spring has not sprung. Not in the northeast. Spring is, at best, a memory and at worst, a mockery. Cause today was freezing. I mean, two-hats cold. Okay, so I wore a hat and a faux-furry hood–and it wasn’t overkill. When the wind was blowing, it must have been just a handful of degrees. And each one of the degrees was mad to be out on a frigid day like this, too, I bet.

Which left me wondering how in the world these girls could traipse around in short shorts and tees, with their arms and legs exposed to the elements. The wintery elements. I mean, can you be that drunk? Does it really make you that warm?

The best costume I saw was a golden retriever wearing a sparkly green bow tie. I know, I know, extra points if he’d been an Irish Setter, but hey, I’m not Irish, either, so I don’t judge.

The worst moment was when I saw two groups of kids–young, like eighteen or so–drunkenly picking a fight with each other. Finally, one guy punched another hard. So hard, that he fell straight back and hit his head on the cement, knocking him out cold. You’d think that’d be the end of it, but another guy just punched the unconscious guy in the face. Punched him while he was
laying prostrate on the cold ground with no fight left in him.

It was awful. It was like watching animals. I don’t understand how humans can have mothers who rocked us to sleep as babies, who dreamt sweet, kind, reaching dreams for us, and then we grow up and break their hearts, not to mention each others’ bodies.

Yes, I realize we don’t all have mothers like that–and maybe that’s the problem, definitely part of it–but the fight was very disturbing and downright evil.

My boyfriend interviewed a lot of people for his show. It’s amazing how many people want to talk to you when there are two things in play: One, alcohol, and two, microphones.

Most people were very nice. Some were a little loony tunes. And all of them were looking festive.

Southie knows how to go hard on St. Patrick’s Day, that’s for sure.

“Are you okay, Jess?” my boyfriend asked me, “I know this isn’t exactly the world you’re used to.”

Looking around at the sea of green-clad, laughing, dazed, cheering, somewhat unruly, and seemingly unfazed-by-the-weather people, I decided I was fine. And interested in all the behavior exhibited around me. And
wishing my green jeans hadn’t broken.

And very, very cold.

What a day!

8 Comments

  1. peaj March 18, 2013

    I like me a party. But an all out bacchanalia isn’t really my thing, either. Particularly where there is unconscious beating going on. Ick.

    So, I’m taking that the green jeans experienced a mechanical failure? How sad. What about the little green tee – did it get to shine on its Day?

    • jessica March 18, 2013

      Haha I forgot about the little green tee! Too bad! I’m sure it’s somewhere in my summer stuff. And yes, the jeans were second hand when I got them and had a mechanical failure last spring. Sad times.

      And no, PJ, this wasn’t your kind of party, I imagine!;)

  2. Rob The First March 18, 2013

    Did no one jump in to help this guy? You all just stood around watching him get the crap beat out of him? Didn’t someone at least call the police? Ugh, that parade sounds crazy–so not my thing. But it’s what I imagine Boston being like from what I’ve heard of the place. I went to the Mardi Gras parade at Universal Studios one year and I swore I’d never do that again. I learned that I have a low tolerance for rude and obnoxious drunks.

    • jessica March 18, 2013

      Hi Rob…whoa. It wasn’t like we were all just excitedly watching it happen. It was terrible. Have you ever been in an uncontrolled crowd when a fight breaks out? It happens REALLY fast. Seriously–one punch and the guy was down. Lightening speed. Then someone else punched him on the ground. Two punches takes about two seconds. No, we weren’t all lazily watching and yawning. The cops were called, don’t worry. It was very sad and disturbing, but there wasn’t a way to prevent it from happening, unless we were telepathic and knew someone was gonna throw the punch. It was chaotic and very sad.

      • Rob The First March 18, 2013

        Oh, I was picturing that it was more of a pummeling and people were standing around. Didn’t mean to sound like such a self-righteous douche. My bad. :/

        • jessica March 18, 2013

          No problem! It’s hard to imagine it if you weren’t there–I hope the guy is okay! At least he was drunk–I’ve heard that can actually save you on impact cause your body is more relaxed and less injury prone–though the whole thing probably wouldn’t have happened UNLESS he was drunk, so there’s that:/

          • Rob The First March 18, 2013

            I’ve heard that too. Sadly, this is why drunk drivers usually survive crashes and their victims do not. I hope that guy was ok too. Between the beer and the concussion I bet he has an awful headache today.

  3. Evangelina March 22, 2013

    Ohhh Boston.. You slay me. Lol

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