Jessica Latshaw

musician. writer. dancer.

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The Difference It Makes to Date Someone Honest.

Posted By on January 29, 2013 in I Lift My Eyes Up, Thoughts and Feelings | 8 comments

There is no tiny, hovering question mark that continually rears its head after every hair-brained or even plausible explanation he gives you.

You do not have to wonder why his car smells like cigarettes when he says he does not smoke. In fact, his car does not smell like cigarettes. Period.

He tells you when he is upset; he tells you when he’s happy. HE TELLS YOU. There is no guessing involved. You can keep the games restricted to solitaire and whatever else does not involve your heart. You know, like Candy Land. Something that does not result in a year of therapy and wading through deep depression if you’re knocked back to the beginning.

He has a business meeting with a woman and that’s all it is. Meanwhile, he can’t wait to see you. Actually, he can’t wait to see you all the time. Even when he just saw you last night. Even when he’ll see you in three hours. The general rule is that he wants to hang out with you. You know this by his actions. The exception is that, yeah, he has a life and you get that and it just gives each of you more to talk about after spending time apart. No big deal.

He does exactly what he says he’s going to do. This takes your breath away.

There is a simplicity to your relationship. You have expectations that are continually met and his surprises are kind. A new pair of shearing scissors. A book on how to make teddy bears. So beautifully far removed from holes punched in the wall and long mysterious disappearances, you can hardly remember that, at one point, you dealt with that.

You are different from each other, but that’s okay. There is no threat. Instead, you celebrate, laugh at, and embrace the differences.

God help us all be honest with each other. Beautiful cities are built on good intentions; on kind actions indelibly connected to true words.

Let’s keep building.

Today, now, forever.

*In the event that you might still be wondering if these differences are better than dating someone who is dishonest, let me spell it out for you: YES.


  1. Sare January 29, 2013

    Beautiful. Honesty is amazing and refreshing..and it really is like a gateway to true intimacy with another person. It makes me SO happy that you are with someone kind and honest and who appreciates you for you. That is what you deserve and I am just so thankful for that. love you, friend!!!!

    • jessica January 30, 2013

      Love you, too!!!!

      And I am so so so grateful.

  2. Mom January 30, 2013

    Oh what a relief it is! No acting! There’s a place for drama but not in relationships. Let the drama and acting stay on stage! Relief.

    • jessica January 30, 2013

      haha very true, Mom! 🙂

  3. Jennifer January 30, 2013

    This makes me so happy and so excited for you! I really wish I could give you a big hug, Jessica!!

    • jessica January 30, 2013

      well then, I consider this comment a sort of internet hug—THANK YOU!!!! <3

  4. Jason January 31, 2013

    What a difference! Sigh of relieeeeeefffffff

    • jessica January 31, 2013

      understatement of a lifetime.

      but maybe all the E’s and F’s make it a little less of an understatement.

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