I love how encouragement has the word courage built right into it.
And I know, it’s no accident.
I don’t know if we realize how powerful our words are. I mean, how amazing that we can make someone’s life better by what we say.
Just today, someone surprised me with a very kind message on facebook. And the thing is, I haven’t seen this person in quite some time. I’ve been gone; she’s been gone. And it’s been that way for a while now.
But the other thing is, she was actually here sometime in January, I think, and I was here too. And though I saw her, I barely said two words to her. This was because, at that time in my life, making eye contact with anyone at my church was difficult. In fact, I rarely did it. I didn’t know what people were thinking about me, what people knew about the intimate details of my story. Suddenly I was the abused kid at the birthday party; everybody else was eating cake and excited about shiny pink packages, while I was wondering what it was that made people smile, anyway. And there were my bruises. They were marks that told the world so clearly how I was not loved, let alone the fact that I was not wearing a party dress and laughing at all their jokes.
And those aren’t exactly the kids who sign up to be on the welcoming team. And well, neither was I, at the time. I perfectly planned my timing for church. I’d get there just after it already started, and leave just before it ended–thereby dodging the hardest part about church for me: people. Interacting with them. Parrying their questions and comments. It wasn’t God who bothered me at all; it was all the people and, quite simply, I was terrified of their thoughts.
Anyway, it wouldn’t surprise me if I hurt some people during my frightened animal stage. It wouldn’t surprise me if they thought I was being a ______ (insert whatever word you’d like there. kinda like mad libs. and who says this blog doesn’t have games?).
But this kind person, she didn’t mention anything about the way I barely spoke to her. She simply said this:
Jess, your heart is beautiful – really precious. and the way you express yourself is simply lovely.
just thought I’d tell you that.
And I was both humbled and encouraged by that. Very much so. Humbled, because I know I could have made a point to be kinder to her when she was here, and yet she says this anyway. Encouraged, because–well, do I have to explain it? Those are some encouraging words. I think you can see why. You guys are very smart, after all.
So let’s all go be like her. If you’re kind of wondering what the heck you’re supposed to do on this earth, anyway, that could be a start. Go say something kind, something that puts courage into someone else.
What a gift we can give each other.
This person who left you the facebook comment sounds amazing! Her words are so true, touching, and beautiful! FYI I love the ad lib, insert whatever you want section of this entry. I wish you could see the words I put in that blank. It was fun! LOL!
Haha JR, I’m sure you did a real good job of filling in the blank with a good word…you’re wonderfully creative like that!!! Perhaps I should start doing more madlibs round here;-)
Jess..how i wish that you never had to go through this pain..it is so true that we each have the power to hurt or heal with our words..and a good word to someone is healing..healing down to the core of who we are. i am so glad that girl e-mailed that to you and i hope so much that kind words just keep coming for you! it’s like that saying that we get hurt by people and God uses people to heal us..it is so very true. you are a special and beautiful woman..
thanks, sarah…and you know, I’ve been more encouraged than I have ever before in these past few months. thanks so much for being a part of that:)
oop–that was me, jess, not my mom!
and haha–OOP. Just one, I guess.
this made me cry a little, just because it is so very true, and because I can be really closed off for no good reason. thank you.
well you’ve been really encouraging to me–and it’s not like we’ve ever spent a ton of concentrated amount of time together. but I know what you mean–sometimes it’s easy to just sort of shut down and go through life, rather than connecting with others in positive ways. it certainly challenges me.
Jess – it’s amazing how words can have such an effect – either blessing or curse. I like the blessing kind the best
well, I have to say that I agree with you there (after much thought and meditation on the subject, of course)!
It is so wonderfully kind of God to send along people to speak encouragement into our lives…what a gift!
I appreciate it so much:)